paul coughlin

author | speaker | reformer

Nice Guy Test

Here’s a self-test to help you discover if the Nice Guy problem is gumming up your life. If you find yourself answering yes to two or more in each category, you’re seriously into being nice. One “yes” in each category means you’re well on your way to being nice. Five yeses overall means you have nice tendencies.

Are you a Good Guy or a Nice Guy?

Answer YES or NO to the following questions.

Test 1: Home Life

  • Are you attracted to or married to a woman who needs to be rescued? Do you think of her as “a diamond in the rough”?
  • Do you lack leadership in your family?
  • Do you make your wife the emotional center of your life?
  • Are you unclear with your wife about your sexual desires?
  • Do you often settle for unfulfilling sex?

Test 2: Work Life

  • Do you find yourself saying one thing to one
  • person, but something different to another?
  • Do you smile, even when you don’t like
  • what’s happening to you, then rant about it later?
  • Do you hide your mistakes, even when the consequences are little or none?

Test 3: Faith Life

  • Do you dismiss or never discuss parts of theBible where Jesus isn’t nice?
  • When wondering WWJD, do you assume a gentle response?
  • Do you think conflict and anger are sins?
  • Are you the guy at church who never says ”no” to an assignment, even if it diminishes other important aspects of your life?
  • Do you think being nice, showing impeccable manners, and being used by others leads people to salvation?

Test 4: Life in General

  • Do you feel embarrassed when people compliment you?
  • Are you envious when you see other men show deep emotion?
  • Do women like talking with you, but show no romantic interest?
  • Do you think it’s selfish to have wants and desires?
  • Do you think that avoiding conflict will make your life better?
  • If someone is angry with you, do you automatically feel they’re right?
  • Do you hide your flaws, even from those close to you?
  • Does fear often stop you from moving ahead?
  • Do you think being nice will make you stand out among other men?

If this test describes you, then you need to get a handle on what’s causing you to be passive as opposed to assertive. No More Christian Nice Guy should help you make this important transformation.

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  • Paul Coughlin! He’s amazing. I’m honored to be speaking with him today. Paul has a prophetic message for men. I’m a big fan. He talks about the martial spirit, about the thumos of men, about moving men from being nice to dangerous and good in the image of Jesus Christ. You have to hear this guy.

    Kenny Luck, Men's Pastor
    Saddleback Church, California
    Founder and President of Every Man's Ministries

    Audio Clip IconAudio Clip from Kenny Luck

Books by Paul

  • No More Christian Nice Girl
  • 5 Secrets Great Dads Know
  • Unleashing Courageous Faith
  • No More Christian Nice Guy
  • No More Jellyfish, Chickens or Wimps
  • Married But Not Engaged


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